Jokes

Jun. 17th, 2021 02:31 pm
olindom: (pic#13801272)
[personal profile] olindom
 Me: Would you like to be the sun in my life?
Her: Awww... Yes!!!
Me: Good!! then stay 92.96 million miles away from me...
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Why are frogs always so happy?
They eat what ever bugs them

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I went down the street to a 24-hour grocery store. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, "Hey! The sign says you're open 24 hours." He Said, "Yes, but not in a row!"
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sent by 
[personal profile] paserbyp 
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
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Two fish in a tank. One says: “How do you drive this thing?“.
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Hear about the new restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.
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- How do you drown a hipster?
- Throw him in the mainstream.
on that one, my kids rolled their eyes and declared : Oh Mom! That's sooo 2013!!! 

Date: 2021-06-17 05:18 pm (UTC)
chuka_lis: (Default)
From: [personal profile] chuka_lis
смешные)

Date: 2021-06-17 09:16 pm (UTC)
paserbyp: (Default)
From: [personal profile] paserbyp
Why did the ketchup blush?
He saw the salad dressing.

What did the elephant ask the naked man?
“How do you breathe out of that thing?”

Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
She outgrew her b-shells!

How is life like toilet paper?
You’re either on a roll or taking shit from someone.

What does one boob say to the other boob?
If we don’t get support, people will think we’re nuts.

What is six inches long, two inches wide, and makes everyone go crazy?
A $100 bill.

How do you spot a blind man on a nude beach?
It’s not hard.

What do you call a useless piece of skin on a penis?
A man.

What kind of bees make milk?
Boo-bees.

- Knock, knock!
- Who’s there?
- Asshole!
- Asshole who?
- Open the door and find out, asshole!

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